When Steven Paul Owens died in September 2021 at age 59, his family wanted his headstone at Warren-Powers Cemetery in Iowa to reflect his personality rather than follow traditional memorial designs. They chose a message that captured his humor and the way he interacted with the people he loved.

At first glance, the headstone appeared to display seven ordinary lines of affectionate words. However, visitors who looked closer discovered something unexpected: the first letter of each line spelled out “FUCK OFF.” The unusual message was intentional and reflected a phrase Steven often used jokingly with family and friends. His children explained that it was an inside joke, not an attempt to offend anyone.

His daughter, Lindsay Owens, said the family wanted a memorial that would remind people of the man behind the name and his distinctive sense of humor. They believed the inscription was a personal tribute that represented the father they remembered.

However, cemetery officials disagreed. They raised concerns about the language being displayed in a shared place where other families came to mourn. The disagreement became serious enough that cemetery trustees discussed possible legal action over the headstone.

Despite the controversy, Lindsay told TODAY in December 2022 that the family had received no further communication from trustees and the headstone remained in place.

The story later sparked online debate about whether families should have complete freedom when choosing memorial inscriptions or whether cemeteries should enforce stricter standards. While some considered the headstone funny and meaningful, others felt its language was inappropriate for a cemetery. For Steven’s children, however, the message was a lasting reminder of their father’s personality and the humor they shared with him.